


Severed

by Pearls1975



Category: Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Angst, Brotherly Love, Character Death, Death, Friendship/Love, Gen, Loneliness, Longing, M/M, Parabatai, Parabatai Bond, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-30
Updated: 2016-08-30
Packaged: 2018-08-12 01:30:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 945
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7915165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pearls1975/pseuds/Pearls1975
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is my version of what I thought Alec would have went through during certain events in "City of Glass".</p>
            </blockquote>





	Severed

**Author's Note:**

> In the book "City of Lost Souls", Alec briefly mentions what it was like when he 'thought' Jace had died. I haven't read the whole book, but so far I am disappointed in the lack of Alec and his reaction so far!
> 
> **THERE BE SPOILERS HERE!**
> 
> I hope you enjoy my little fiction. Please let me know what you think, this hasn't been beta-read, yet, so it is subject to changes!

_Parabatai._

The Word echoed through Alec's mind like a drumbeat. He desperately pushed the noise in his head down as he slashed at the Demon in front of him. Alec turned on the ball of his left foot and slashed the Demon behind him and found he had backed himself to the edge of the plain; something he rarely did. Shaking his head, he turned to run back into battle but his feet wouldn't budge. 

_Parabatai._

The Voice knocked the breath out of his lungs; they burned as he tried to draw in air. Placing his hand in his chest, he counted backwards from ten to stave off whatever was consuming him. He finally took a deep breath and winced at the stabbing pain developing in his head. 

_Parabatai._

The Whisper came out of the woods on a breeze and Alec turned. The woods, heavy with shadows and secrets, called to him as his feet took on a life of their own and he walked into the dark forest. The air was heady with the pine sap and the dampened shrubbery below his feet. Alec's breathing increased as a horrible hollowness enveloped him. 

_Alec. Alec._

Looking around, he found himself surrounded by the thick forest as his name was repeated on the wind like a heart beat. He tried to call out, but nothing came but a dry noise from his throat. He coughed and tried again, calling Jace's name. He blinked as he realized it was Jace's voice calling his name. 

_Alec. Alec. Alec. Alec._

Like his own heartbeat, his name came faster and stronger as the adrenaline in his body ran rampant, making his anxieties ten fold. He tore at his hair trying to call for Jace, but nothing would come out except a dry whisper. 

_Silence._

It surrounded him like a wet blanket, making his chest heavy and his head hurt. He licked his lips, trying to grasp what was happening to him. The silence was so palpable, he thought he had gone deaf. He backed himself into a tree, clutching onto the rough bark to ground himself. He bent his head as tears came rolling down his cheeks, unbidden. 

Something snapped inside him.

A life line being severed. 

Jace's life line. 

Alec fell to his knees and screamed Jace's name as a black hole bore itself into his heart at the same Valentine drove the Mortal Sword into Jace's chest. 

_'Ave atque vale.'_

The words fell from Alec's lips just as fat tears fell from his eyes. He had never felt such loneliness...such despair. He wanted to reach into his chest and pull out his own heart because he knew it would feel better than the hole there now. 

Drawing in a deep breath, the forest swirled around him, like colors in a painting bleeding together. His head still pounding and dizziness consumed him as he felt himself caught up in the swirling, like a house in a tornado. He closed his eyes tightly and Jace's golden angel face appeared against the darkness behind his eyelids; his mouth curled in his familiar uneven grin, his golden hair forming a halo and his honey bright eyes smiling at Alec, and a familiar tightness formed in his chest as his heart beat faster. 

Like the house in the tornado, he was dropped in the battlefield as if nothing happened, his heart whole and Jace's life line intact. 

Alec fought fiercely and bravely and stood breathlessly on the grassy plain looking at the blood and ichor that slicked the grass. He gritted his teeth at the smell as he saw the other Shadowhunters that were standing, that were alive and he let out a breath of relief. He was thinking of Jace. He should have been thinking of his fellow Hunters, but instead his mind drifted to the scene in the woods. Alec shuddered as he looked back at the forest, the fading sunlight shone through the underbrush, chasing the shadows and emptiness away. 

 

 

“Jace,” Alec didn't mean for the name to come out so breathlessly a couple hours later; he hated his feelings came out in his words. But to see his Parabatai - albeit laying in bed looking worse for wear – seeing Jace alive and breathing and smirking at him, brought a flood of relief he couldn't hold back. Just like the tight hug he gave him. 

“Hey, Alec,” Jace's voice rumbled through his chest and vibrated through Alec. Guilt ate at the edges of Jace's consciousness; Clary was the first thing he thought of when he woke on the beach. He knew it should have been Alec. “I can't breath.” 

“Oh, sorry, I-” Alec stopped himself as he let go of the other and looked away. Jace tilted his head to see Alec was blushing. He placed a hand on Alec's arm and he looked back at him with shining blue eyes. His breath caught in his throat. 

“Are you...crying?” 

“No, no! Just something in my eye,” Alec shook his head and wiped his eye. “Listen, I just wanted to make sure everything was okay. I will leave you al-”

“Alec,” Jace grabbed his wrist as he stood. His touch was warm on Alec's wrist as he sat back down. Jace let go of his wrist and grabbed his hand as if they were tracking, and pulled Alec forward, resting his forehead on the others. “We are Parabatai, we will never really be alone.” 

“Thank you, Jace.” Alec decided he would tell him what happened in the forest at a later time. He had Jace to himself for a while and he was going to take advantage of the time.


End file.
